Updated: Jan 25
There’s nothing wrong with doing good deeds for others. It’s part of being human, and it’s part of what we are called to do. Giving our time, energy, and money is how we can be a blessing to others. Losing perspective about how much and how often one gives of themselves may take you into the territory where the balance of what is healthy giving and what is giving for the wrong reasons is shifted.
Here are some suggestions to consider in order to get back on track so that giving to others feels healthy, balanced, and rewarding.
You know the instruction you have to put your own oxygen mask on first before helping others. Take care of yourself and your own needs.
Giving beyond your capacity may exhaust you, leave you feeling drained, and overwhelmed. Give from overflow.
Too often with people-pleasing, you may automatically jump in and say “Yes” before thinking it through. Even though the response feels like the right thing to do, but for all the wrong reasons. You’re in charge of how you spend your time. Before saying yes, wait to see if it is a definite YES or maybe it should be a kind NO.
We can’t all have the same beliefs, values, or opinions. If you find yourself agreeing, just to agree, stand in your own truth and let others stand in theirs. It’s ok if someone doesn’t agree with you!
While praise and kind words can make anyone feel good, people-pleasers depend on validation. If your self-worth rests entirely on what others think about you, you’ll only feel good when others shower you with compliments. Self-love and self-worth are God-given.